Holiday Happenings

So, I see its getting to the time when ol Saint Nick is supposed to shoot down the chimney and leave all kinds of stuff for everyone.  I know its been cold here in NC specially today.  So, Ive been going to my workouts but not killing myself.  Not at all.  My trip to the dentist was encouraging and discouraging all at the same time.  The good side is it can be fixed, the bad side is Ill loose a tooth. Then the good side is Ill get an implant.  I know, its no big deal….I know.  Ive been a bit more accepting of my situation and health lately.   I know that I have the virus and have had it for a long time.  I look healthy but then I know the reality.  Im getting older and I am a long term survivor of HIV/AIDS.  Im cool with that but I dont want to go out without a fight.  Its not bout the money anymore per say.  I mean I make enough to live and keep a roof over my head, pay car insurance and even a cheap membership at the gym.  Im pretty low maintenance at this point.  M problem is I have a hard time asking for help.  The strange thing is I seem to have alot of people ask me for donations.  Everytime I go to the store, someone is outside with some knd of basket or bell asking for donations.  I even had someone ask me for donations to help spread AIDS awareness.  I mean sheesh.  If they only knew I myself have been living with it for 18 years.  Go figure huh?  One long term survivor of HIV/AIDS who devoted his life to research and a cure for HIV has died.  His name is Spencer Cox.  So he helped alot within the HIV research community and Im sure millions of lives were saved through his efforts.  He was only 44 and died from complications from pneumonia.  So Im sure one day, hopefully not too soon I will like Spencer be added to the list of those who died from Aids.  If Im lucky it wont be and Ill live to a ripe old age.  Unfortunately I doubt that will happen.  As good as my health is now I predict I may have 10 more years of living to do tops.  So, instead of pondering that I try and find what joy I can out of life.  I like to watch the wind blow the leaves around and watch the trees sway back and forth and watch the little birds fly around this place.  Simple yet much more enjoyable then the rat race I once was so consumed by.  I still hear yea, I goona be making all this money or when i get this degree Ill be racking in the bucks.  I have to laugh, Ive already been there.  Excess leads to excess, Im a prime example of it.  Too much too soon and you fizzle out.  So, what may work for some doesnt work for others.  Im not good with alot of money, it doesnt work for me.  ill spend and do stupid stuff well i used to anyway. So, simple is better now.  My new book has 6000 words so far.  So its about 4 chapters and is coming along fine.  Ive been at it about 3 weeks a couple hours a day.  Not killing myself at all.  Well, my rants are calm right now, Im not really finding a need to, just taking things one day at a time.  Its all I can do.  Maybe after the first I will but for now….Im just chillin.  Happy Holidays and stay safe,warm and healthy.  DaveImage


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