Fished Out, Ramblings Of Another Struggling Author

Ok, so I think I am all fished out. Literally! I have been fishing the lakes of and around Raleigh, Durham North Carolina for the past year when I’m not writing a manuscript for a book or blogging for companies. It’s amazing how many people come up on a daily basis and ask…”Catch anything?” Out here there are different types of people depending on where you go. For starters you can be in Durham and the people are more city oriented and about half African American and half white. If you travel maybe 10-15 miles west you run into a different type of people. Most are country folks who have their own opinion of the city folks and it isn’t all good. Seems like it’s two entirely different worlds.

For me being from San Diego and having been in the Marines here in NC in the 80’s I seem to get along more with the country people. Many are veterans and have their own political beliefs and if you aren’t offended by some pretty colorful language you can get along with them great. I love fishing and you will meet a lot of country fisherman out here. The stories I have heard and the friends I’ve met over the past couple of years has probably reached the 3 digit mark just from fishing Jordan Lake and Lake Michie here. Some of the more interesting people have entertained me and me them for hours on end as we patiently wait for that monster catfish or bass to hit. It really is alot of fun and my expertise in fishing has become more…well…expertise….haha. If your into chatting it up with some down home folks it can really make the day go well and fishing at the lakes is 3 bucks cheap. The lakes are huge and for a few more dollars you can rent a boat or a canoe. Not a bad deal for a guy from a town that cost 1500 bucks for a rat hole apartment.

Sure living here is much cheaper and the jobs are not the best but for someone like me living on a fixed income after my bout of meningitis, it suits me well. So, the books I wrote, the short horror stories like “Tina” were thought up from my living among the country folks and I guess I kinda of like the oldness and simplicity of that kind of life. But, as in the book “Tina” there are skeletons in every closet, even the darkest recesses of a country home closet with that single lightbulb illuminating it’s skeletons. I really like coming up with some pretty wackly stories and the latest, “Mother Dearest, Till Death Do We Part” kind of brought out the dark yet humorous side of me. To not get too deep into who I am, I figured my obsession with dark humor and horror came from my own upbringing, abuse and finally my own father’s suicide when I was 17. I think he had his own skeletons as we all do and they crashed down out of his closet or so he felt they had in his mind. Why else would someone off themselves? That is probably where I get the ideas and the drive to write short horror stories. Getting them read and rated, well that’s another story. I’m still a nobody in the writing world and we all know how hard it is to get noticed there! Last year I published a Novella called “Love Me Till Tomorrow” which is an apocalyptic romance book and it came out fairly decent. I think however, the more you write the better you get. Then, it comes second nature and is easier as you go along. Well, it’s the fourth of July 2014 and I’d like to wish everyone a happy fourth and play it safe, don’t booze cuz you will definitely lose and enjoy the weekend! Oh, and just in case you wanted to read a wacky short horror book, check out It’s on Kindle and really needs a push!

The Park!

Ok so yesterday I was reallypissed off.  I felt like life was too much trouble anymore.  I tried so hard writing The Sunshine Murders and felt like it was all pointless.  But then I thought what if I never did it at all?  That woulda sucked even more.  Im just not really selling any books or Audible versions because I dont know how to market at all.  So today I went to the park with my son and the better half.  We played football and walked three times around the park thingy trail  Then I lay down and just looked up into space and realized that yes Im a very small little being on such a huge planet. So as I lay there I was staring at a tree that was above me and way way up I could see a couple hawks flying over head and I felt like that was all life really is,  It isnt cars, or stuff or anything,,,its just finding a peace you can live with.  Thats hard in this world and I know it.  But the little things like feeling the cold from the 40 something breeze is invigorating.  Kinda wakes you up.  So, I may have written a book that flopped but Im still here and doing what I can.

Weekend Plans?

Ok, so I usually dont have many plans for the weekend.   Usually I just write alot.  Im trying to write one thousand words a day on my new book.   Thats really not alot especially if your writing a book.  I mean once you get moving and the story kind of unfolds in your mine, its real easy to find yourself at 5,000 words a a few hours.  My problem now is Im just not motivated as much.  Maybe its all the other shit going on.  Its snowing or freezing rain so, my car is being used because it has a higher profile and good tires. So, since I dont drive so much I just say yea go ahead, use it. Like I said, Im not as materialistic as I used to be.  Its just not that important anymore.  I do like to mess around with stocks here and there and deposit 50 bucks a month in my stock account just for shits and giggles.  I even invested in some Mexican bank stocks..Dont laugh, they have been doing well.  So thats the deal there.  I updated a utube video.   I usually dont do Utube videos but everyonce in a while I will just so people I know will think Im ok and havent died or falling off the planet….lol…So thats the deal there. I have always liked stuff like music and art and sports that are challenging.  Now more so than ever I find myself just picking up the guitar and playing some random riff.  I usually just think it up as I go along.  Like this Madman on A Guitar video clip.  Thats just my nature is to do wacky stuff even though now I am much tamer than I was back in the day.  So, alot of people will probably think whatever to my guitar playing madman sessions.  I have some friends back in San Diego, well one in particular that Ive known for years.  We always considered ourselves best friends or bros. lol..I remember spendng hours hanging out in his backyard which overlooked Lindburgh field airport and pounding beers and then beating up one of those crazy boxing dummies that has the head and upper body of a man.  That was some funny shit no doubt….Couple of drunk idiots beating up a boxing dummy.   I can see my son picking up some of my characteristics.  He doesnt see it but I do.   Chip off the old block I guess.   So anyways thats the update, not much happening…..

Sales On Audible!

I made some sales on Audible On The Sunshine Murders!  This is the new series book which has five tales in the series.  So, Im so happy it made sales just two days  after I updated the book.  Originally it only had three tales of murder and mayhem on the California coast, but now Ive added two more series to it.  The last two wind down John Brodis’ career and it end with his retirement.  This book I spent alot of time tweaking to get it jut right.  o, Im glad that i old some copies right out the gate.  It i a pretty wacky book and although its not too long (Two hours and something( on Audible, its really came out well.  So Im sure my narrator Luke Smith will be happy with the results.  I also have it updated on Kindle and Amazon and it really reads much better.  I wont say how much I paid for the editing but, well…it probably was not in the budget.  Its ok, Ill survive. Im just glad some people thought it was good enough to actually buy it.  I know what other authors go through now.  Initially and even now I dont consider myself a real author but the more I write the more I see what its all about.   Writing is not something where you just visualize and everything just works.  you have to just sit down and write, thats it.  Dont over think, dont project what  may or may not happen.  Just do it.  So thats what Ive been doing.  Some people have told me I write pretty visually which makes me feel good about what Im doing.  And to everyone who has been supportive I just want to thank you.  To Casey Voight, Larissa and the people who have supported me by leaving me positive comments I really appreciate it.  Even my brother Mike has been supportive and I havent seen him in a few years.  The last I saw him was when I was recouperating from the hospitalization.  He is a pretty cool dude.  He was pretty surprised when I came back and began writing after being so sick. I have posted an update on my new book Im writing but I’m not rushing through anything with that one.   Im taking it day by day.  So, thats the deal there.

Dave and his son

Dave and his son

Cold Cold Cold

Today its cold, for me anyways.  Probly about 28 degrees.  15 years ago I remember working in a freezer for Schwanns Foods as a loader  The job was brutal! My job consisted of offloading frozen food and stocking it in a freezer that was held at 22 below zero.  The lights were those single bulbs and were placed all around the freezer, so when you were working these lights would be hanging right above your head.  After a couple hours in the freezer the cold can really fuck with your head.  Your bones burn and you can become disoriented.  So, that may be why I hate the cold now.  Back then it was necessity, I had to work and jobs were scarce.  This was in New Mexico in the mid 90’s before I started working as an electrician.  Now, Its a  different time for me.  I no longer have to go bust my ass for others to make make a dollar.  Ive learned that there are tools in life to get you through almost everything.  I also learned that money is not the answer to all of my problems.. My health has become a little more important at this point.  I know its an issue but I try and fake it I guess.  There are lots of things I can still do it just takes a little more effort.  Like playing football catch sometimes can be a bit rough for me.  My crazy breathing machine is helping me some though.  Its weird, it feels like Im scuba diving kinda.  But its supposed to help.  I hear that alot of people have sleep apnea and do nothing about it.  That may be the reason so many people drop dead from diabetes and heart disease among a other things.  Same with HIV.  I found that a quarter of  the people with the illness dont even know they have it.  Thats crazy man.  So, I guess Im lucky.  I have some resources.  I also found out that people in rural areas drop dead from Aids because of the lack of care or HIV medications.  Theres a program called ADAP which is designed to get medication for people with HIV and its overloaded.  There just arent funds or something happens and people get screwed.   Then without meds they die.  It happens right here in the good ol USA. So today Im doing a little more writing on my romance book.  Maybe 10 pages.  Ill see how it goes.  Ive been following alot of the posts from people who are writers.  I know its a tough job, you have to like what your doing and I really dont think you can write tinking theres a big payoff.  Its a personal thing.  The reward is not always monetary.  So, Id like to thank Casey Voight for recognizing my efforts and Clifta for helping me with my exercise regiment over the last year.  Without their guidance and support Im sure Id of given up a while ago.

Snow Day!

Last night it snowed here.  Not a whole lot,just enough to cover the ground.  I like the snow.  It makes everything look like its new again.  It cleans away all the funk and is so much fun to mess around in.  I have been doing some more writing on my new romance book.  Maybe a couple hours a day I guess.  Depends how I feel.  The one thing that kinda amazes me is that for all the crap Ive been through and put myself through, I still have some hope.  I mean, do I think Ill ever get out of my rut?  Probably not, I mean Ill probly always be poor, Im cool with that.  I think if anything I really just want peace.  Like Im not interested in the newest As seen on TV piece of shit, I dont get too excited about TGIF.  For all intents,everyday is a Friday for me.  I do get stoked when checkin out new videos of surfing.  I love the surf break Teahupoo.  I mean, Ive never surfed it but it is the most awesome wave Ive ever seen.  It breaks on some seriously dangerous reefs and is freakin gigantic when it breaks but its such a mysterious wave.  Laird Hamilton took off on this break over a decade ago when people thought it was unsurfable.  If you havent see a Teahupoo wave check it out on Utube.  So, thats what gets my blood moving.  Surf.  Back when I was a kid I used to have a  ton of surf posters on my walls of surfers like Shaun Thompson, Laird Hamilton, Mark Richards and a whole bunch of other rippers from the 70s.   Then in the early 80s to late 80s I surfed with some of the best out in San Diego.  I even managed to surf some semi pro events and came in the top three in a contest when I was in NC in 1984.   I remember the day, it was so freakin cold and the waves were big and choppy.  The trophies were all set up and the two who were thought to take first were me and a guy from Florida.  I surfed my heart out and caught a good backside wave and got tubed which almost putthe contest in the bag for me.  The guy from Florida caught a good right, and ripped some killer off the lips and I think a couple 360s on a wave and he ended up edging me out.  So, I took second.  But out of about 50 surfers all up and down the east coast I thought that was cool.  I had a wife back then, we were young, about 20 so I was all caught up in surfing and women and partying so yea the relationship tanked eventually..But the surfing was my love and really always has been.  Women were second, and in the end probably my downfall.  With surfing came lots of women.  Some from Brazil, others from my hometown.  I ended up taking the bait and got caught up with alot of them.  So, now I look back and realize that surfing was all I ever really wanted in life.  Just to be in the water is what floats my boat.  A few months ago when I was in California I went out at Oceanside pier and had a blast.  Once I hitt the water I knew I was back in my element.  Theres nothing like paddling out on a glassy day and having nice 3-4 foot lefts breaking perfect.   The ironic thing is that all of the changes we go through as people, you can always go to the beach and still see waves break.  It never really changes.  I mean there are flat days, big days, choppy days but its always there.  The beach is where I grew up, my dad was a diehard surfer and all of my friends too.  Then shit changes, some turn to drugs, some to alcohol, some go crazy, life happens.  But the beach is always there, it doesnt really change much.   So, today I find myself in a different scene.  Like maybe I grew up too late I dont know.  Maybe I never really was prepared to live and raise a kid even though Im doing it.  Hes 10 now, almost sixth grade.  I can remember holding him when he was  few months old and his head wobbling like a bobblehead.  Now hes big, wow…life is weird.  Sometimes he will see old pictures of me and go wow, thats cool. Or, I want to surf.  I tell him its a lifestyle, you dont just wake up one day and start rippin waves.  It takes years of dedication. He has no patience for that.  So, I doubt he will ever really get into surfing.  I took him once and he freaked.  lol…I thought it was funny.  So, I want to thank or congratulate Casey Voight for her nomination on The Next Big Thing Award.  Congrats Casey and thanks for nominating me as well.  Cool stuff.   Check Casey out, shes hot, smart, witty and talented.   Other than that, Im laying low today…nothing happens when the snow falls around here.  Everything seems to tank.  34289_1465539951891_1035296850_1347765_196550_n22741RTdcn4hFL._SL500_AA300_

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